My present for you; A piece of advice

After knowing you for 18 years now, and being your friend for most of them, the best advice I think I can give you is live your live, try to understand yourself, meditate, travel on your own enjoying the scenery, go out with friends, have a laugth, and live with no complications. 

The only thing I can tell you is that in this live you should do things that will make you happy. Even if we know that sometimes we will hurt someone we love. But if we don’t try we will never get the chance to know if we did the right thing or not.

Only when you are on your own and understand your real needs, and have in your mind what do you expect of the other in a relationship you will be ready to have one without hurting each other.

I know that when I get a bit annoyed I send you to talk to your mother, that obviously knows you better than anyone in the entire world, but she still a mum and will want the best for you, and the best for you is not always that makes us happier.

As you told me before as long as you have a family that loves you and cares for you, you will always have a roof to sleep under, sometimes leaving a person is difficult due to the bonds you made, but if you have a bad start, probably you will have a worst ending. 

If you really care about a person talk to him or her and don’t impose your own criteria about relationships and friendships. Communication is the best way of understanding. If the two of you are not able to communicate and expose each other your needs, likings, problems, aims, Etc., … what is the base of your coexistence?

This was my very first contact with the person that says that loves you, we didn´t know each other, but I was a bit annoyed with her behaviour, due to I got this message:

“I am his girlfriend. We are moving in together. He has deleted you on Facebook. Do not send any more friend requests.”

I knew something wasn’t quite right.

How a woman that I hadn’t had the pleasure of knowing believe herself with the right of imposing me and another person that we cannot be friends.

But as I am a very polite and understanding person, I decided to answer to her in the very best way I could:

“I´m happy for you two. He will always be one of my best friends even if we are apart and living 2.000 km driving from each other, for your message I know that you are not able to understand the reason of this matter. Anyway I wish you luck and patience and that your love and friendship for him persist in time as ours have done. Please send him all my love (now that I found out that you forced him to block me from his contacts)

Regards,

Me”

Reading another people messages, getting inside others accounts and similar behaviours are synthons of a manipulative, controlling and dominant person. That tries to look for the mistakes or what the other person is doing wrong instead of looking in to the oneself and made a constructive criticism of her/himself.

It´s only a piece of advice, but sometimes you are better off on your own:

Go for whatever makes you happy

Whatever makes you feel bad leave it

Whatever makes you smile keep it

Sentimientos Inconvenientes

Al principio pensaba que solo iba a ser un capricho, que sería algo temporal, pero poco a poco, al volverse a ver se empezaron a crear pensamientos diarios acerca de él, un no sé qué que no sabría muy bien cómo definir.

Hace un mes aproximadamente que se encontraron por casualidad, se encontraron agradables el uno al otro y tuvieron una larga e interesante conversación. En vez de sentirse atraída por el chico alto, guapo, simpático y soltero que la presentaron hace poco, se sintió de alguna manera interesada por este otro, con el que un amistad sería algo extraña y ni que decir tiene que algo más irá creando controversia en la gente y la sociedad que nos rodea.

La mayoría de las veces las fantasías más intensas o apasionadas están relacionadas con historias de amores imposibles, prohibidos o inconvenientes. Y al hablar con él sentía esa sensación incomoda, pero que al mismo tiempo no quieres frenar; con pensamientos, actitudes y miradas que no se pueden ocultar.

Ahora hay ganas de volver a verlo pero con pies de plomo para intentar no parecer que lo que la mueve es lo que hay, esconder todos los sentimientos para ser capaces de hacer cosas que en un momento fueron impensables y mostrarse fría frente al mundo para no ser herida una vez más.

Marta:   ¿Qué te parece?

Ruben:  Es muy bonito

Te tendrías que dedicar a escribir libros, te lo digo en serio, que ahora las historias de ese tipo están muy en auge y me da que como casi siempre, la historia es por experiencias propias, o me equivoco? jaja

Marta:   No te lo cuento, que me pillas en todas, es un secreto.

             Si tuviera tiempo si que escribiría más, pero ya sabes lo que hay

Ruben:  No me es para nada raro la verdad, anda que no he conocido casos iguales, y que siguen iguales, lo único, a no ser que este casado, arrejuntado o cualquiera de esas opciones

Marta:   Esta soltero y sin compromiso

Ruben: ¿ Entonces??¿ Entiendo que al principio pues hombre, siempre hay discrepancias, pero si cuaja la historia, pues mira, eso que os lleváis los dos, y si no pues también os lo habéis llevado. Ya te me estas centrando xikiya. Bueno, más bien madurando , que suena mejor.

Marta:   El problemas es que no sé qué hacer y que me gustaría verle más pero tampoco quiero que se piense que soy una pesada por mandarle mensajes o que estoy desesperada o algo de eso, así que me contengo y espero que me diga el algo y luego me dice que si me he enfadado...

Ruben:   ¿Pero no os habéis visto ya un par de veces? Es que haber, si a él le notas que va a lo que va, pues olvídate, porque querrá quedar contigo cuando le apetezca, pero tampoco pasa nada, por amagar un poco a ver qué sucede, quiero decir; “ no tengo nada que hacer te quieres venir a tomar un café o algo”, tampoco que sea algo tan radical, tampoco te vas a casar con él ni nada, así es como se conoce a la gente. Joer , pero si no paráis de decírmelo a mí , tanto tú como mis amigos, jaja, ponlo en práctica.

Marta:   Vaya como te pones... dar consejos se me da mejor, cuando a uno le toca es más complicado

Ruben:  Pero tú no te preocupes. Supongo que siempre sabrás que hacer, y aunque nunca sepamos cual es el límite de ser pesados o no, por lo menos se intenta al menos porque luego es peor pensar lo que podrías haber hecho y al final no hiciste nada

 

Lo cierto es que si ninguno de los dos tiene pareja, solo hay dos opciones; intentarlo y ver poco a poco lo que sucede o desistir si se tiene la certeza de que no está realmente interesado. Si no hay certeza alguna, lo único seguro es que el que no arriesga no gana.

A Reception Story

This happened in my previous work. I worked for a Spanish recognized jewellery at the main offices and hand craft studio. For the nature of the business there were cameras in all the floors and halls at the building.  One fine day, there were interviews for a vacant position, and among the candidates came up this good looking boy, with a nice suit and shiny polished shoes. He asked me to keep his bagpack at reception during the interview.

When he left, by chance it happens to be a few female employees at my position looking at the cameras when we realized that this guy has stopped at one of the halls, by one side, and he started stripping; he took off his jacket, his nice ironed shirt, took off his trousers, and shoes…

We all could not believe that he wouldn’t realize about all the cameras, really visible by anyone. Or maybe he just didn’t bothered about it. The thing is that I was going to call him by the interphone communicator in the hall but when I tried to it was too late…. He was already naked and I was surrounded by many staff, even the interviewer, singing all along “You can leave your hat on….”

He opened the bagpack and put on a normal t-shirt, jeans and flip flop sandals, packed away the suit and walked out of the building like nothing ever had happened. Nice lad. It may be a men thing because in my entire career never seen a woman doing stripping in a hall between floors after an interview, but men are a different matter.